Permanent Solutions
by Doctor Ella
Summary: After the fight, Carter goes to talk to Abby, but when she doesn't talk to him, he does something drastic...A/N this story is now finished, and any reviews on how (or if) you liked it would be GREAT!
1. Permanent Soultions

Disclaimer: I don't own any characters, yada, yada, blah, blah, blah. ;) A/N: Please R&R! This is my 2nd fic, and the best so far, so tips are awesome!  
  
Permanent Solutions- Takes place after "Things Change"  
  
Carter's POV:  
  
I sat there thinking. Thinking about my life, my job, my family, but most importantly Abby. What had I done? I had yelled at her. How could I have done that? She is the most important thing in my life now that Gamma is gone. And what had I gone and done? I had pushed her away like she has done to me so many times before. I know how she must be feeling, for I have felt the same way so many times. I am pushing away the best thing in my life. Sure, I was having a horrible day, but that is no excuse. She was just trying to help me the way I am always trying to help her. I have to talk to her. I need her more than ever. I miss Gamma so much, and now all I want to do is hold Abby, I want her to comfort me when I need it most. I am going to talk to her.  
  
* * * *  
  
As I ring her doorbell, I am terrified. Terrified that she won't let me in, terrified of what she might say. But then, she has done this to me so many times before...that means she owes me, right? I hope so.  
  
"Abby?"  
  
She had opened the door for me.  
  
"Abby, I'm really sorry. I really need to talk to you.  
  
Tears were running down her face. I could tell that she'd been crying.  
  
"Not now Carter."  
  
Those words hit me like ice. 'Carter'.she must have really been pissed at me to be calling me that. I hadn't heard her call me that in such a long time.  
  
"But Abby, I..."  
  
"Carter, go home. I can't do this."  
  
I couldn't believe this. My heart just felt so. so empty.  
  
"Okay."  
  
I managed to choke out fighting my own tears. I had cried so many times in that one week. More than I think I've ever cried before. I wasn't going to start now, not in front of her. So I started walking home.  
  
* * * *  
  
Abby's POV  
  
'What am I doing?' I thought to myself. One little argument can't be like this. Carter. John is having such a rough time. He just lost the only family who's ever cared about him, and now that I am the one thing in his life, and he is the best thing that I've ever had in my life, I'm just going to give up? I mean, but then again what does it matter? I don't deserve him. He probably just pities me or something. Maybe we should just end it for his sake. He deserves so much more than me. No. I don't care. I may just be being selfish, but I. I love him. I really do, more than I've ever loved anyone before. But now he must think that I'm a horrible person for hurting him so much and not loving him. Loving him the way he loves me. I don't know what just happened, but it isn't going to happen ever again. I have to find him.  
  
* * * *  
  
As I knock on the door of his apartment, he doesn't answer. God, please let him answer. I have to tell him that I'm sorry. I have to be there for him. I knock again. Yet again no answer. I look at the key to his place that he gave me awhile ago. Should I use it? Should I go in? What would he do? Well, right now I don't care. I have to see him. I unlock the door and peer inside the empty, lonely apartment.  
  
"Hello? John?"  
  
No reply. Maybe he has a shift, or maybe he just... I froze. There he was, John Carter, lying on the bathroom floor, lifeless. I wanted to run over to him so badly, but my legs wouldn't obey my thoughts. I couldn't believe this was happening. Thoughts raced through my mind 'was it my fault?' or I could have prevented this.' But these thoughts were cut short when suddenly I broke out of my trance. I ran over to him, blood running all down his arms.  
  
"Don't do this to me John!"  
  
I was crying hysterically now, just hoping that he was still alive.  
  
Do you guys like? Should I continue?? 


	2. Destructive Actions

Permanent Solutions- chapter 2 * * * *  
  
"Hey, Susan."  
  
"Oh, hey luka. How's it goin?"  
  
"Pretty good, uh. So, are you doing anything tonight?"  
  
"Oh, um, I."  
  
Haleh sticks her head into the lounge.  
  
"Hey, Dr. Lewis, Dr. Kovac, trauma comin' in. Attempted suicide."  
  
"Okay Haleh, we're coming." Luka replied.  
  
"Um, Susan, can we talk later?"  
  
"Sure Luka. Let's go, I hate suicide attempts."  
  
* * * * "ETA?"  
  
"Now." As the ambulance rolled up, the EMT gave the bullet-  
  
"We've got a 32 year old male, attempted suicide with deep slits in both wrists. He also seems to have some sort of irregular amount of drug in his system form the look of the monitors. The girlfriend called in."  
  
"Okay, let's go, and let's get a.. Abby?"  
  
"Susan, I didn't mean.he.its all my fault!"  
  
Abby was sobbing, and had tears running all down her face.  
  
"Abby, what is going o... Carter?!"  
  
"Oh, God. Susan, he needs blood now! He's lost at least a couple of liters." Luka said with a sort of terror in his voice.  
  
"Susan, you have to. you have to save him!"  
  
"Abby, it's okay, we're going to do the very best we can."  
  
Susan, now had tears in her eyes, but refused to break down in front of Abby. Carter was her best friend now that Mark was gone. She couldn't lose someone else that was that close to her.  
  
"No, Susan, you SAVE him! This is all my fault!"  
  
"No, Abby, it's going to be okay. We'll save him. We have to."  
  
* * * * ~45 minutes later~  
  
"V-fib!"  
  
"Okay, charge to 250. CLEAR!"  
  
"Still in fib!"  
  
"Charge again to 300! CLEAR!"  
  
"V-tach!"  
  
"AGAIN! CLEAR!"  
  
"Okay, I've got a rhythm and a faint pulse.  
  
"Okay, good. Good.  
  
"Labs are back."  
  
Susan looked at the labs, and just stood there, looking at the paper in disbelief. Terror was written all over her face.  
  
"Susan, what did he take?" Dr. Weaver asked impatiently.  
  
"It's. um. fetanyol.  
  
* * * * * * * *  
  
So, you guys like it so far? I appreciate the reviews ;) and hope for a lot more! 


	3. While We Wait

Chapter 3 * * * * *  
  
"Abby, I need to talk to you." Susan's hands were shaking from the trauma, the lab results. pretty much the whole situation.  
  
"Susan, is he okay? Oh, God, please tell me that he's okay." Abby had stopped crying for the most part, but her face was still blood red.  
  
"Abby, he took an overdose of fetanyol."  
  
Abby's face immediately turned white as a ghost.  
  
"Fet.fetanyol? How the hell did he get his hands on that? He stopped with the drugs two years ago."  
  
Tears started to come up out of her eyes again; she couldn't believe that this all was happening.  
  
"He." Susan paused, closed her eyes, and took a deep breath. "He came into work today. Just for a minute. But, he wasn't scheduled to work, so he just told me that he had to get something- a coat I think it was- out of his locker."  
  
Susan paused again for a second, just trembling.  
  
"A stabbing victim had come in earlier, and. he was allergic to the meds we were going to give him. so instead, we gave him fetanyol. So since he was there, I asked Carter if he could watch the patient for about 5 minutes while I talked with the husband. He, he. Oh God Abby, I'm so sorry! He must have taken the patient's fetanyol from the hospital. If only I hadn't asked him to stay..."  
  
Now both Abby and Susan were crying. Susan sat down next to Abby and hugged her while they both cried.  
  
"Is he- is he brain dead?  
  
Susan paused.  
  
"The monitor shows very little brain activity right now. But I've seen many patients in this same condition that have fully recovered."  
  
"How much of a chance does he have Susan?" Abby was horrified. Her face was still pale.very pale.  
  
"well, we don't know--"  
  
"Susan, just tell me please!"  
  
"About. about 20%."  
  
"Oh, God!" Abby broke down again, and Susan, stayed there holding her friend in her arms. Waiting. 


	4. Hope

Chapter 4- "The Word of Hope" * * * * * Abby's POV  
  
I sat there in the chapel, praying. Yes, I was praying. I hadn't done that since I was a little girl. I pretty much gave up any hope that there even was a God a long time ago. But I have to try. I have to hope. I don't think I'll survive if he never recovers. I have taken him for granted for so long. I never realized how much he means to me. Not until his life was in jeopardy.  
  
"God?" I say, not knowing if anyone was even there.  
  
"Please don't let him die. I swear that if he recovers, I will never take him for granted again. Please God."  
  
I just kept repeating that prayer over and over again in my head. It seemed like it was the only thing I could do to help him. * * * * *  
  
After about two hours of me just sitting in the chapel, Susan opened the door, and came to sit down next to me.  
  
"Are you okay?" She asked, yet already knowing the answer.  
  
"No, but I think I am doing a little better. I am just doing the only thing that might help."  
  
"Abby - there are signs on the monitor. Signs that his brain is functioning."  
  
I turned my head, and looked into my friend's eyes. I could see the excitement: the hope that, yes, John could live.  
  
"Can - can I see him, Susan?"  
  
"Of course. I'll walk you there." * * * * *  
  
I stood there at the foot of his bed. Just looking at his limp, motionless body.  
  
"I'll leave you here with him." Susan walked out of the room, leaving me with the one person I could never live without. I sat down next to him, and held his hand.  
  
"John? John, I'm so sorry. I can't live without you, you have to get better, okay? I know that I've never told you this before, but I - I love you. I love you more than anything else in the world."  
  
Just then, I felt him squeeze my hand. It was so slight, and so weak, but it was there. He had moved; he had heard me. He was going to be okay. * * * * *  
  
Hey, guys, thanks for the reviews! And keep them up! I am so glad ya'll like my fic! It is only my 2nd!! :-D 


	5. Hold On

Chapter 5 - "Hold On" * * * * *  
  
~It had been exactly one week since Carter's first purposeful movement.~  
  
Abby's POV  
  
One week. A whole week since he had squeezed my hand. In that one moment I had known he'd be alright. But he hadn't woken up. An entire week where I've sat by his side just talking to him, waiting for him to wake up.  
  
"Abby, you might want to come in here." Susan's voice jerked me out of my deep thought.  
  
"What is it? Is he okay? What's happening?" I was so scared. Scared that maybe he had gone into arrest, or maybe there was no signs of brain activity.  
  
"No, everything is okay - for now - WE are going to see if he can breathe on his own."  
  
"Oh, God, already?"  
  
"Yes. Come on Abby, you need to be in here."  
  
Now I was petrified. They were about to unhook his breathing machine. If he didn't start breathing within ten seconds, than that was it. He would be gone forever.  
  
"Okay Abby, you know the drill. Ten seconds -"  
  
"Yeah, I know." As Susan unhooked the machine, I held my breath. My hands were trembling.  
  
'1, 2, 3, 4, 5.' I was counting in my own head, Thoughts were racing all through my mind. He wasn't breathing after five seconds, oh God, what if he never takes another breath again? '8, 9, 10.' No, oh god no. He didn't take a breath. Is that it? Was that really it?  
  
"I'm - I'm so sorry Abby." Susan was really hurting. I could tell looking into her tearing eyes.  
  
"No! That can't just be it! I-"  
  
"Dr. Lewis!" Yosh nodded his hear towards Carter. "He's - he's breathing." * * * * * OK you guys. I have 1 more chapter up my sleeve, and I appreciate all the reviews! I will update some time next week ( 


	6. Our Life

Our Life Ch. 6  
  
Abby's POV * * * * *  
  
"John?" I was now leaning over his bed with tears running all down my face.  
  
"John, I'm here. It's me, Abby. Can you hear me?" I put my hand on his and watched as he slowly opened his eyes.  
  
"Abby, I-"  
  
"John, don't talk." I couldn't believe this. He knew who I was, and he could talk. After an entire week of slow brain activity, he had suddenly recovered. I guess Susan was right.  
  
"Where - Where am I?"  
  
"You're at the hospital, John. You're going to be alright."  
  
"Abby, I'm so sorry. I didn't mean to hurt you, I just - I just - "  
  
"It's okay." I was still crying and now I could see that John had started to cry too.  
  
"You don't have to explain right now, and God please don't cry."  
  
"Abby, I - I heard you. I heard you when you told me that you love me. I am so sorry Abby, I thought - I just - I just didn't know what to do, and when I heard you, I couldn't do anything except move my hand to show you - to show you that I love you too. I didn't think you would take me back, and I knew I couldn't live without you. But now I feel so guilty for scaring you and for putting you through so much pain. I would never hurt you Abby, but now, I think I did, and I am so sorry for that. I love you."  
  
I just stood there looking at him. I never knew he had felt this way. I was just so glad that he was alive. So I leant down, and kissed him. It was the most meaningful, gentle, most perfect kiss we'd ever shared. * * * * *  
  
Carter's POV  
  
I had been recovering for two weeks now. 'I finally get to go home' I thought to myself. Of course I was looking at months, no, probably years of therapy, but at least I got to get out of this hospital. Everyone who works here had visited me at least twice each, and Abby had come to see me every day. I am so grateful to Susan and Luka for saving me, and I am so grateful to Abby for being there for me. We're going to be okay. Just like I've told her before. I know that we will have little problems in the future, but I know now, we are going to be okay.  
  
"Come on Abby, lets go home." I held out my hand, and she took it, and we walked out, hand in hand.  
  
THE END * * * * *  
  
So, we finally have a happy ending ( YAY! LOL, yeah, and I have another story on the way, so watch out!! R&R!! 


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